180 lbs down, 20 to go!

Hey everyone! My name is Mary, and I've lost 180 lbs by evolving into a plant based diet. I am from and live in gorgeous Southern California. I am passionate about the foods that I love, animals, being a dork, the beach, free thinkers, people with unique world views, people who want to make the world better, people who make me think, and the hope that maybe one day the vegan community can be a united front!

We all come into our choices in our own time, but my truth is that a plant based diet not only opened up my heart and mind, but freed me from food addiction and morbid obesity!

This blog is a way for me to be accountable, for me to be inspired by the journey of others, to express appreciation for the things that I love, to inspire, and to learn!

In 2008, I weighed 335 lbs. By the end of 2009, I weighed about 199 lbs. Since then, my weight had gotten back up to 267, and I stayed there for a hot minute. Anyway, 2011 ended and I realized that I spent most of the year dreaming about what I wanted to happen rather than making it happen. 2012 started with me meeting none of my 2011 goals. 2013 started with a weight loss of 60 lbs in 2012, and -128 lbs total. I am currently at a -180 lb weight loss!!!

HW - 335 lbs
SW - 267 lbs
CW - 207 lbs
1st GW - 199 lbs
UGW - 130 lbs
Jan 6 2012 - 267
March 24 2012 - 251
April 10 2012 - 232
Dec 10th 2012 - 213
Jan 7 2013 - 207
Jan 24 2013 - 199
Feb 15 2013 - 193
March 27 - 189
April 28 - 174
May 22 2013 - 170
Jan 15 2014 - 164
Feb 20 2014 - 159

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I am fighting typing up this post, but this is going to be a hard habit to give up.  The other day I was talking to someone close to me.  He is the biggest doer, kick ass, amazing person I have ever met.  He doesn’t talk shit about anything, he just does it.  Anyway, my anxiety has been acting up, so I told him that I wasn’t drinking coffee that day.  I explained how coffee makes my anxiety worse, and it makes me feel like crap lately.  

Later that day I had coffee, and when he called me back I told him.  It wasn’t a big deal, but then it kind of was.  It was a stupid little promise that I didn’t keep to myself.  And then I remembered all of the times through the years that I told him that I needed to quit caffeine and I hadn’t.  I thought about it and it made me feel kind of like an idiot that I let a beverage master me in that way.  

So, as of about 9am this morning (when I had made the decision), I am done with coffee.  I am adding “no caffeine” to my September challenge, and I just need to accept it and do this one once and for all.  Lord help me.


Shakti is the Goddess or cosmic feminine force and is perceived as Ultimate Power.
Whereas the God or cosmic masculine force is worshiped as SHIVA, meaning peace, SHAKTI is the power of peace. 
It is not power born of violence or aggression. It is power born in passivity, in silence of mind, the energy which comes forth from the void, like life that comes forth from the womb. 
SHAKTI is not power which is asserted against something, but a power that enlivens everything from within.
By K.Nagori

This speaks to me right now, because I am so tired of seeing women act masculine to be tough.  I don’t mean calling on your masculine side, I mean the aggressive, you don’t know who you’re dealing with, I am a badass, etc.  If you’re a pro MMA fighter, then cool, but it doesn’t take a psychology degree to see that most women who declare themselves ready to beat someone’s ass or telling people to be afraid of them aren’t channeling real strength, it’s cheap, fake, and temporary.  Next week they are breaking down.  
I want my strength to be real, and I want it to be sustainable.  Real strength without getting defensive is an area that I really need to work on right now.  I AM working on it.  
If you’re sad, add more lipstick and attack.

Coco Chanel. (via ajeebinsaan)

(Source: barneysny)

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[IMAGE DESCRIPTION: A manatee facing the photographer, one fin outstretched. TEXT: “Backsliding happens. Do not be discouraged. A path does not end because you took a few steps back.”](Image credit to ABC News)
My goals today are to do Buti Yoga, some Kundalini, and to fill my belly with nutrient rich foods.  This week was such crap, so this weekend I want to bring a real awareness into taking care of myself and building up my inner strength.

Shiva and ShaktiConsciousness and EnergyAmongst the attributes of the Chakras we meet two important symbols: Shiva and Shakti.SHIVA symbolizes consciousness, the masculine principle.SHAKTI symbolizes the feminine principle, the activating power and energy.Whenever a power becomes active, and wherever energy exists, Shakti is working. Other terms for these primal principles are PURUSHA and PRAKRITI; Purusha is consciousness and Prakriti is nature.Lord Shiva is generally portrayed holding a trident, which represents the trinity of Īshwara, Purusha and Prakriti .Īshwara is the omnipresent, eternal, formless divine principle; Purusha is the Ātmā and Prakriti is the manifestation, nature. An electric light can be used to explain their relationship. The electric current, which is the source of the light, is Īshwara; the light is Purusha, and the object that is illuminated is Prakriti.SHAKTI (or Prakriti) means energy, power, movement, change, nature. It is the maternal principle – the provider, abundance. In the human as well as in the animal kingdom the mother offers nourishment, warmth and security. There is no greater love than the love of a mother. The mother carries and nourishes the child in her own body. When it is born she provides it with mother’s milk and raises it at the sacrifice of her own self until it becomes self-reliant.SHIVA (or Purusha), on the other hand, is pure consciousness – the unchanging, unlimited and unswayable observer. Purusha has no desires whatsoever; these are inherent only in Prakriti. Purusha is the empty, clear screen onto which Prakriti projects her colorful film.Shiva and Shakti are manifestations of the all-in-one divine consciousness - different sides of the same coin. In many pictures these two primal powers are each depicted as being one half of the same image; one side female and one side male. The left side is the Divine Mother, Pārvatī, the “feminine” energy, and the right side represents Shiva, the “masculine” consciousness.Through the splitting of the primordial principle at the advent of creation the duality within our lives came into being, together with a strong force that is constantly striving to re-unite with the other part.Only when Shiva and Shakti combine can action, movement and creation arise. Until energy is impregnated with consciousness it is ignorant, disordered, aimless and “blind”. Energy alone can produce nothing; consciousness bestows upon it content, form and direction. Conversely, consciousness without energy is dormant power, sleeping energy, and on its own is unable to be the cause of anything. Just as Prakriti without Purusha is unable to act, and vice versa, Purusha without Prakriti is also incapable of creating anything.The meaning of Shiva and Shakti is occasionally misunderstood when Shiva and Shakti are looked upon as “man” and “woman” and their union is regarded as a sexual relationship. Sexuality is something completely natural, and misunderstanding arises only when sexuality and spirituality are mixed.Sexuality is the union of man and womanSpirituality is the union of the human and the divine consciousness.Shiva and Shakti exist within each of us as the masculine and feminine principles. This has an effect on the physical level – it is the cause of sexual attraction. Within man there exists a tendency towards the feminine qualities, and within woman a tendency towards the masculine. Through this the masculine consciousness is attracted by the feminine and vice versa. If both are in balance there is no sexual attraction. But if a tendency for the masculine predominates in man, or the feminine in woman, this results in a preference for a homosexual partner.Shiva resides in the Sahasrāra Chakra and Shakti in the Mūlādhāra Chakra. When Prakriti and Purusha unite in the Sahasrāra Chakra, knowledge, know-er and the object of knowledge become one. Once we have experienced this no desires remain within us because we realize unequivocally that everything we have ever yearned for is carried within us. In this state of absolute consciousness there are no polarities and therefore no more sorrows; there is only everlasting joy, unconditional love, unlimited compassion and total understanding for all living beings.For as long as consciousness is connected to the physical body it is unable to remain constantly in the Sahasrāra Chakra and so returns to the residence of the Ātmā in the Heart Center (Anāhata Chakra). A realized person always thinks, feels and acts from the heart. Embedded in eternal love and eternal happiness, that person is always conscious of the immortal Ātmā, the ocean of bliss, and their consciousness is forever connected to the divine consciousness.Shakti is the motherly love of God that surrounds us with warmth, caring and protection.Shiva is the paternal love of God that gives us consciousness, clarity and knowledge.I wish for you the blessing of the Divine Mother who lives within you as energy and vitality, and the blessing of the Divine Father who resides within you as consciousness and knowledge. May they always take care of you, protect you and guide you, and in their infinite love lead you to the cosmic consciousness.Artist: George Atherton


Watch this if you’ve been feeling down and want to finally have a good outlook on today




SOLAR PLEXUS CHAKRA(Manipura) – Zodiac signs Aries, Leo and Sagittarius

The 6th Ray of "Devotion" governs this chakra. This chakra symbol connects us with the energy to “act” and is the seat of self-esteem and expressing our personal power. Our relationship to…

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